potential lame-ness...

day: 24
my bloggers!

i have no freakin’ clue where this post is going – so bear with me & lemme apologize in advance for potential lame-ness!

i just got home from the gym a little bit ago and had a really great workout!
well – minus the douchebag two ellipticals (i just realized i have been spelling that word wrong for years btw) down who talked on his cell phone for his 20 minute workout.
so rude!

and ya know i am not an asshole – take a call if ya gotta (even though signs are posted asking that cell phones only be used in the lobby) – but to talk 20 minutes so loudly that i could hear you over my earphones with the volume blaring– well then you are just a dick!
that loser made me miss sex & the city and distracted me during my workout – double doozy fucktard!

other than that – gym was awesome!

i did 30 minutes on the e l l i p t i c a l & another 30 minutes circuit training.
yay me!
i am by no means buff – but i swear i feel buff-er.
heh
okay maybe not buff-er --- but definitely strong-er!

tomorrow my younger son, peyton, turns 15.
i know what you are thinking? how could a sweet young thing like myself have a child who is 15?
heh
okay i will stop…

so yeah…
peyton’s b-day and we usually have a big family dinner with cake & ice cream – typcial b-day stuff.
we are still having that – i am just opting to have some healthier options in the mix.
like grilled chicken breast, steamed broccoli, and i got an amazing cupcake recipe (i will share tomorrow with photos).
plus i am not a total birthday party nazi so we are having my son’s favorite homemade mac & cheese (i will be skipping this one) and he loves banana split ice cream by friendly’s.

it’s all about compromise. and honestly, if i didn’t have weigh-in on friday i might partake a little more than the plan in my head. but typically i plot out my menu in the morning and stick to it and am usually really on mark the day before a weigh-in. and i will be plotting fo’ sho’ tomorrow.
i need a good weigh-in this week
(dammit!)

okay peeps – this chick has to take her fluffy ass to bed!
and can i say how fucking awesome you blog-o-sphere people are… truly. the nicest bunch of people i have never met in my entire life.
:smirk:
i could say more but then i would get mushy and shit.
point is : me love ya long time!

spread the bloggy l♥ve, eat your veggies, and love yourself!
xxoo
cyn

*** thanking google images – unless noted ***

warning:guard your skinny clothes

day: 15

hello blogdom!
can you believe i am just getting home from the gym?
yeah @ 11:30pm…
but most nights during the week i don’t get there until 9:30ish and i by the time i workout and tan (i know – so snooki) it’s late.
plus my gym buddy is my mom – and this is the only time our schedules gel.
it’s a small price to pay really and far better than not going at all.

my mom is a hot shit.
she is 63 and has had two hip replacements and she will run circles around you all considering. she might not kill it speed wise but miss thang has endurance!
we are very close and i love her to pieces but she also makes me nutty… heh.
don’t all moms?
i know my oldest son would like to duct tape my mouth on more than one occasion.

but ahem back to me…
so tonight i did 30 minutes on the eliptical again and i swear to all that holy that i thought my tits were gonna sweat right off me.
i was huffin’ it and all i am gonna say is this -- all you sexy gals shopping at my beloved tjmaxx (i am cheap and on a budget) best guard those skinny bitch sizes cause i am coming after them and i know how to shop like a mofo on a mission and i will find all the cool clothes!
oh i will…
oh yes – i fully admit that smaller clothes motivate me!
(among other things like health, longevity, this blog, and you phenomenal yet slightly mental peeps who read my drivel!)
there is no effin’ shame in vanity my friends.
(told ya i adore sex & the city and wanna be carrie bradshaw when i grow up)

plus…
i am sick to death of shopping in the ali baba tent section and still looking like shit.
honestly – a big ass top does not make you look thinner.
i hate that mentality.
because it perpetuates the denial i tend to suffer when it comes to how i really look and what i really weigh. hiding what i know it under that big top or baggy pants but too chicken shit to confront it.
but that is a whole other blog post.
the psychology of my fat.

boo hiss what a downer i am being aye?
but sometimes ya gotta be reminscent of that which got you where you are…
i never want to forget because i never wanna be there/here again!

so just a head’s up…
rock out with your crock out tomorrow -- w00ts -- trying out another new recipe and it is super easy peasy again.
l♥vin’ it!
i promise the pics will be better this week. sometimes i rock the camera and other times you can tell i prolly forgot and am staging photos. not saying that is what i did last week (that is totally what i did) but you know how it is.

happy monday ya’ll – let’s make this week spectacular by owning it, rocking it, and loving it!
spread the bloggy l♥ve, eat your veggies, and love yourself!
cyn

*** thanking google images unless noted***

***just wanna say that i totalllllly suck at replying to comments sometimes -- i have a crazy ass toddler who i am potty training, two teenagers, my lovah, oh and me (i am a full-time job alone!) -- that gets me slack right? anywho -- i read every single word and l♥ve you all for taking the time to just write let along write such nice things. and i always return the follow and the like -- it is the courteous thing to do and i fully support my fellow bloggers and am madly in love with this community -- the good, the bad, and the ugly!

mwahsssssssssssssssss***

my effin' epiphany

day: 10
hello blogdom!

so my first *official* weigh-in at my designated weight watchers location on friday morning is looming.
gulp!
it’s all good in the hood…
we weight watcher folk know that when you work the plan – the plan works!

and gurrrrrl… i rupaul-like worked the plan!
(love her)
“you better work!”
*snap snap twirl*

i was op (on plan) like a mofo.
i earned ap’s (activity points) like a mofo.
and best of all, i avoided the trigger foods like a mofo!

i weighed myself on monday (my one week mark) and i was down 2lbs. exactly on the button – woots – so i do at least expect that much to be off on friday. right?
it better be off or i am going all hulk like!
Turn green, kick stuff over and say, "you won’t like me when i’m angry … rowrrrr!”.
(wait he is pretty buff -- not a bad gig)
okay that’s a crock of shit – i can make a grown man cry with a swift word outta my filthy mouth but i’m a lover not a fighter. no violent temper here.

but all this *i better lose this week* attitude really got me to thinking about what it is i really want out of this weight watchers journey…

the ultimate goal is to lose weight right?
well it would seem…
but then i got to thinking. i can lose weight, i have done that for a good majority of my life through puberty, indulgence, laziness, emotional eating and three babies!
i know what to do…
i know about portion control…
i know its basic math –ya gotta burn more than you eat – duh!
i know exercise (especially at my age – yeah i said it!) is not key – its vital. ya gotta shake that bootie and sweat!
i know all of this.

what i have issue with is commitment.
i have never stuck it out.
in all four (i had a short stint for about a month right after my daughter was born) of my times on weight watchers not once have i made it the 16 weeks and gotten the charm! i have gotten a 25lbs key chain and the 20% charm (it is hiding in shame in a box somewhere) but i have never stuck it out.
and this is where the heavens parted, the celestial beings hummed or something, and i dear friends had one of those fancy schmancy effin' epiphany’s.

my goal is to stick it out and work the plan for 16 weeks. i mean what is the worst that can happen?
i lose weight – might not be all the weight i wanna lose but i would assume i will be significantly smaller in four months?
i will eat better?
i continue to hit the gym to earn those ap’s?
and all of these things become healthy habits and i remain committed to my health from the inside out.
and maybe even rock those skinny jeans i got lying around!
(btw i am a sex & the city lovah – they do no wrong in my eyes – and the miranda skinny jean episode is a fave and a classic!)

so with that being said; i am not setting a goal weight or even a lump amount of weight I want to lose just yet. i just want to commit and i am pretty sure my commitment will take care of the rest.

xxoo!
eat your veggies and love yourself!
cyn

** images found via google images **