Sunday, October 9, 2011

the power of girlfriends -- meet ciao mama

day: 35

so last monday i was graciously asked to write a
post about women and our friendships for ms. daffy @ batcrap crazy in conjuction with friends you l♥ve -- a month long blog celebrating & empowering women and other women closest to us.

friends you l♥ve hosts a blog hop every monday where you select a friend from the blogosphere to guest post at your place and come on back and link up to the blog hop! all blog hop participants (guest posters included) are eligible to win prizes from eyedews!
(this is just one of many really cool events they have going on this entire month!)

okay phew – with all that being said, you guys know i am all about spreading the bloggy l♥ve & what better way than to pass the torch on. without a thought i asked ciao mama from the fabulous blog
mommy bags to guest post and what follows is simply lovely and the perfect example of why i chose her…
she is real, raw, hysterical, sincere, stylish, and if we weren’t on opposite ends of this country – i can guarantee we would be besties and having some mad misadventures of our own!
without further adieu … ms. mommy bags herself!

It was set up to be just another week until I received an email from Cyn over at
Misadventures of a Chunky Goddess one of my favorite all time blogs. Besides being a kick ass gal the girl is just friggin funny and has quickly become a really great bloggy friend.
Ms. Cyn asked me to do a guest post and I was what the f*** are you serious? Like…. I am about to gag ova here…I was so stoked and so honored the first thing I did was freak out…What would I post…how about if I sucked donkey balls and would have to hide my pitiful self from the bloggy world forever? I snapped out of it and I decided I would just be me and just write the way I write. The post was supposed to be about women and friendships this is all in conjunction with friends you love - a month long blog/site that celebrates & empowers women through discussing our bonds with other women. Again, thank you so much for the honor Cyn.

Quality over quantity any day. I used to be vice versa just a few years ago. I felt the more “friends” I had around me the better. I felt I needed a bunch of people around me in order to feel accepted. It was so high school it was ridiculous. As you grow up and get older you realize what the meaning of true friendship is. I discovered who I thought were friends of mine {and ours} were just really “acquaintances” at best. I discovered that women I thought were sisters were actually just fakes – I know you’re like…… this is supposed to be about great friendships between women - I am getting to the point I swear.

I saw the true colors of these friends when the shit hit the fan – when my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer I saw the light. I saw women who told me they would always be there for me and I thought were best friends run for the hills. No phone calls to see how my mom was doing, no support calls and just no calls. I will always remember the hurt I felt, here I am going through the most painful thing ever and there was no one around. In a way it destroyed the little trust I had for women. My first emotion was to go after them with fists flying but after calming down I decided they were just not worth the trouble and jail time. Through all this dark “muck” I was going through at the time quite a few bright lights of hope flashed through and showed me what true friendship is supposed to be. I received phone calls from friends that I had lost contact with because of all the BS of hanging out with certain members of the “group”. These women checked on me and my well-being and they called to see if they could do anything for me and my fam. They were there when my mom passed away. They showed up at the wake they showed up when I placed mom in her resting place. They were there when I cried myself to sleep for months straight and refused to leave the house because I felt so lost. They were there when I picked up the phone every day to call my mom and realized she was no longer here. They took me out, they helped me out and finally I started to feel better. One of my friends helped me build the crib and get the nursery ready when my hubby was too busy at work and I too prego to work the drill. These friends gave me a baby shower and sent many welcomes when baby was born. These friends have been around when I just needed a hug a glass of wine and a shoulder to cry on. These to me are true friends, friends that are in your life that make you feel special and loved and that you matter. There is only a handful in my life right now because I choose it to be that way. I would rather have a handful of really good jelly beans in a jar than a jar of so so jelly beans.
I love all of mine to pieces and you know who you are! I have learned allot during my 41 years and the one thing I did learn is that truly good friends are hard to find…Show them some love and let them know how special they are. Peace!

told ya see is fabulous… please stop by her blog -- mommy bags -- and give her a shout out!
she rocks!
thanks mb!

spread the bloggy l♥ve, eat your veggies, and love yourself!


SoCal Sweetheart said...

Both of u guys are awesome!! <3 <3

Ducky said...

My bests were the arms that held me up through my sister's sudden tragic death and the divorce I went through shortly after it. One of the blessings of experiencing the most difficult time in my life thus far is that peoples true colors did shine through. And I'm all the better for it!

Fantastic post and awesome tribute to friendship!!

StylinMom said...

love this post...and love both of your blogs!!

The Spring Mount 6 Pack said...

Hi, new follower from the hop. Come by and say hi

Michael Ann said...

Great post from one of my favorite bloggy friends. Yes, true friends will stick with you through all the ups, but most importantly the downs. I'm glad you have a good support group now, and I'm so sorry that you have lost your mom :( {{{HUGS}}}