ROCK OUT with your CROCK OUT

day: 16

hello bloggy peeps!
another edition of rock out with your crock out – w00ts!
my quest to find easy -- yet healthy -- crock pot recipes that are lurkin’ out there in cyber space just waiting to be discovered and made into a favorite.
and trust me; this ain’t always so easy!
plus i gotta feed three hungy big-ass male types and my trap – so consider this a quest second to finding the fountain of youth!

in my search for a new recipe for this week i went to a tried and true favorite site as a repeat offender on weight watchers -- laa loosh. it has a vast list of weight watcher friendly recipes and even offers the points+ value. (unless it is an older recipe in which you will have to enter into the recipe builder on weight watchers online -- a pain in the ass i might add – but worth it if you are a anal retentive tracker like me!)

so i am always looking for something new that is not only healthy but something my brood will eat. what i found was creamy chicken and mushrooms macaroni crock pot recipe.
yeah, yeah, yeah okay i admit – it doesn’t even sound healthy – but it tries really freakin’ hard. plus when all else fails – i am not above slippin’ something green and leafy in there to at least get a veggie and some vitamins in.
and i was willing to give it a whirl in the effort to get brian (my lovah) to eat anything fat-free. he does *light* but fat-free is against his religion. and who can blame him – cause come on it doesn’t taste the same – i don’t care what anyone says!
i digress…
so here in the recipe – copied & pasted word for word via the site – link above will take ya right there even.

creamy chicken and mushrooms macaroni crock pot recipe
ingredients:
1 (10 3/4 oz.) can healthy request cream of chicken soup
1/4 cup land o lakes no-fat sour cream
16 oz. skinned & boned uncooked chicken breast, cut into 20 pieces
1 cup (one 4oz. can) sliced mushrooms, drained
1/2 cup finely chopped onion
1 1/3 cups (3oz) uncooked elbow macaroni
salt and pepper to taste
directions:
spray a slow cooker container with butter flavored cooking spray. in the prepared container, combine chicken soup & sour cream. stir in chicken, mushrooms, and onion. add uncooked macaroni. mix well to combine. cover & cook on low for 6 to 8 hours. gently stir again just before serving. enjoy! makes 4 servings.

serving size = 1 cup
each serving = 9 weight watches points+

okay – first of all lemme say this much – martha fucking stewart i am not –- so recipes in general are not my forte’- hence why i am doing a crock pot feature.
anyone can crock pot – even me – and as my profile says – i crock pot like a mofo!
but let me stop there and let the recipe do the talking…

so i got all my ingredients together – i have to double the recipe because no way in bloody hell would this feed my guys. (i opted for whole wheat elbows & 98% fat free cream of chicken soup -- but kept everything else to the *t*)

i mix it all together – and here is where i get a little scared.
something just didn’t look right.

right?
but hey what do i know – there were no photos (shoulda been my first clue and a rule from now on – no photo; no make! ).
about two hours in i take a peek and it really doesn’t look right. very dry and umm kinda gross.
so i do what any non-martha-fucking-stewart type would do.
i break out…

yeah, chicken broth fixes anything right? it’s like the duct tape of the pantry, no?

two more hours and now i am swearing.

me: umm what the fuck is this shit in my crock pot?
brian: i dunno? why?
me: because i dunno where my pasta went and i am about to lose my shit.
*looks into crockpot*
brian: oh yeah look at that shit, weird!

no word of a lie – not one elbow. not even a blooming trace of an elbow. and those little bastards were brown as hell and there isn’t even a brown speck!
i am befuddled!
and before you ask – yes, i followed the recipe exactly as it was written
well -- minus adding the chicken stock.
which I add more of because it just a pot of goo with the random chunk of chicken and a rare mushroom in it.
ew!
i add more chicken stock.
i add peas.
more chicken stock…
and this is what i get…

the only way i can think to describe it is that it was kinda, sorta, but not really like a half-assed pot of chicken in dumplings minus the dumplings and the tasty veggies.
yeah i tasted it – i had to.
it was starchy – of course – it had a 2 2/3 cups of annihilated pasta in it.
*sigh*
boo hoo!

so i did what any red-blooded non-martha-freaking-stewart type would do…
i called domino’s for my family…

and this for me.
yeah oatmeal for dinner.

it’s okay – i am a freakazoid and lurve oatmeal.

but needless to say – creamy chicken and mushrooms macaroni crock pot recipe was an utter flop. actually flop is too nice of a word and to call it a flop is an insult to decent flops!
it was starchy random chicken vile!
blech!
so yeah – don’t try this recipe – it suckeths!

nothing against laa loosh.
i have tried other recipes and had great success.
but nothing has ever been this bad.
ever!

remember the rule – no photo; no make!

i promise to find an actual edible recipe next time…
no really, i will – i have a crock pot like a mofo reputation to protect!

spread the bloggy l♥ve, eat your veggies, and love yourself!
cyn